Wednesday, August 3, 2011

The NEXT goal

So...what happens after you hit your goal?

Good question.

I puzzled over this for awhile. I don't want to go back where I was but I didn't have any real motivation to get better.

Until...the other morning when I woke up and started thinking about a mountain biking trip I've been invited to go on with some friends in about 10 months. It's a 100 mile loop, 3 days, camp-in and ride-out trip in the middle of NOWHERE on slick rock in Canyonlands, UT.

I went on this same trail about 3 years ago, and not gonna lie, it handed my ass to me. Physically, emotionally, you name it.


Obviously, maintain GW, if not hit lower GW. I don't want to get too much thinner because FUCK!!! None of my clothes fit me anymore!!! All my friends joke because they threaten to pants clothes are so huge! I went from a 12 to a 2. For real.

But the real goal is to be a really good mountain biker by May 2012. Be able to handle serious technical shit, be able to climb, have killer stamina, ride at the front of the pack with the big boys, if only for a little while.

And yes, I know this is a weird goal for a thinspo site. Don't get me wrong, bones will ALWAYS be, for me, the absolute epitome of perfect beauty. But I will never be that. And that's okay, I guess...

For me, now, STRONG is the new skinny. Maybe that's come with age, but I've actually never been smaller, never been thinner, and never felt better. So, yeah.

New goal. See you in 10 months...

I did it.

I'll just keep this one short and sweet. I'll just say one thing -

I did it.

I set a goal for myself months ago and it sucked along the way - at many, many points; but I pushed through and didn't let in. I hit GW.

I just got home from the vacation of a lifetime (yachting, beaches, shopping on Madison avenue, y'know, whatnot) and the whole time I never thought about my weight or my body. I even got in a slick 6 mile run around Central Park in Manhattan on my birthday which, I NEVER would have been able to do 4 months ago.

So - just know this:

Don't EVER let ANYONE tell you what you can and can't do. If you want it, and if you sacrifice enough, you can do anything.

I had people laugh at me.
Out loud.
And tell me I was crazy for starving and working out every day.

Fuck them. They don't live in my head. They don't live in my skin. All that matters is what I feel.

And now - I feel great.